Tampered Quotes
The following were reportedly winners in a New York Magazine contest in which contestants were to take a well-known expression in a foreign language, change a single letter, and provide a definition for the new expression.
- HARLEZ-VOUS FRANCAIS?
- Can you drive a French motorcycle?
- IDIOS AMIGOS
- We're wild and crazy guys!
- VENI, VIPI, VICI
- I came, I'm a very important person, I conquered.
- COGITO EGGO SUM
- I think; therefore I am a waffle.
- RIGOR MORRIS
- The cat is dead.
- RESPONDEZ S'IL VOUS PLAID
- Honk if you're Scottish.
- QUE SERA SERF
- Life is feudal.
- LE ROI EST MORT. JIVE LE ROI.
- The king is dead. No kidding.
- POSH MORTEM
- Death styles of the rich and famous.
- PRO BOZO PUBLICO
- Support your local clown.
- MONAGE A TROIS
- I am three years old.
- FELIX NAVIDAD
- Our cat has a boat.
- HASTE CUISINE
- Fast French food.
- VENI, VIDI, VICE
- I came, I saw, I partied.
- QUIP PRO QUO
- A fast retort.
- ALOHA OY
- Love; greetings; farewell; from such a pain you should never know.
- MAZEL TON
- Tons of luck.
- PORTE-KOCHERE
- Sacramental wine.
- ICH LIEBE RICH
- I'm really crazy about having dough.
- FUI GENERIS
- What's mine is mine.
- VISA LA FRANCE
- Don't leave your chateau without it.
- CA VA SANS DIRT
- And that's not gossip.
- MERCI RIEN
- Thanks for nothin'!
- AMICUS PURIAE
- Platonic friend.
- L'ETAT, C'EST MOO
- I'm bossy around here.
- Cogito, ergo spud
- I think, therefore I Yam. (OK, more than one letter.)
- VENI, VIDI, VELCRO
- I came, I saw, I stuck around (OK, another exception.)
Here are more in a similar vein:
- "Cogito ergo Spam"
- (I'm pink therefore I'm Spam)
- "Domino vobiscum"
- (The pizza dude is here)
- "Auda similarum ad seattles"
- (They all sound like Pearl Jam)
- "Sharpei diem"
- (Sieze the wrinkled dog)
- "Nucleo predicus dispella conducticus"
- (Remove foil before microwaving)
- "Motorolus interruptus"
- (Hold on, I'm going into a tunnel)
- "Il guyus nissanem iste ickye"
- (That Nissan guy gives me the creeps)
- "Bodicus mutilatimus, unemploymi forevercus"
- (Better take the nose ring out before the job interview)
- "E puribus tupac"
- (Rap is everywhere)
- "Robotisticus governantimus inevitabilitus"
- (Al Gore is going to be President)
- "Ignoramus microsoftus multa pecunia dat"
- (Yeah, where DO I want to go today?)
- "Et tu, pluribus unum"
- (The government just stabbed me in the back)
- "Nunc tutus exitus computarus"
- (It is now safe to turn off your computer)
